Finding the Way Back to Each Other

Disconnection is inevitable. It happens in every relationship. What matters most isn’t that it happens, but how we choose to meet it. Connection is built not by never losing each other, but by learning the pathways back.

These are some of the practices I lean on myself, and ones I often guide my clients through when they find themselves caught in the stuckness of disconnection. They’re not about pretending the rupture didn’t happen, but about helping the body and heart soften enough to find each other again. Some are done together, some alone, all of them are invitations to return to presence and repair.

Sometimes the simplest thing is to sit side by side and breathe. No talking, no pressure, just sighing together until your nervous systems catch the signal that it’s safe to soften again.

Other times, the medicine is a pause. Five, ten, twenty minutes, a break to let the heat drain out of your body. A pause isn’t leaving. It’s stepping away so you can return with more calm.

Cuddling can do what words can’t. Letting yourself be held, or wrapping your arms around the other, melts the edges and reminds you that you’re not against each other, you’re in it together.

Movement helps shift the stuckness. Put on a song, dance, shake, let your energy move. Then slow down, breathe, and feel the stillness as you settle back into each other.

Sometimes all it takes is a walk. Out of the room, out of the loop. Side by side, silence or light words, letting the rhythm of your steps reset the rhythm of your connection.

Gratitude is a powerful bridge. Naming something you appreciate about the other, and acknowledging your own part in the disconnection, softens defensiveness and opens the door to repair.

Play can be its own reset button. Silly faces, funny noises, little bits of nonsense that only make sense in your dynamic. If it feels safe, laughter can break through the heaviness and bring you back to each other.

There are times when space is needed. Not to run away or plan a comeback, but to genuinely regulate your own system. Stepping aside to breathe, stretch, or journal until you’re grounded enough to return.

Animals and comfort help too. Petting a dog, curling up with a furry friend, or sinking under a weighted blanket can soothe your body back into safety when words aren’t working.

And sometimes, the only way back is through release. Crying, shaking, screaming into a pillow, letting your body express what it’s holding. Clearing the charge creates space for connection to return.

These ten aren’t rules, just invitations. Some you’ll do together, some on your own, and each one is simply a pathway back to presence.

Try them, play with them, notice what lands in your dynamic.

Repair is an art - and every bond has its own language.

With love, Narla